Thursday, April 15, 2010

Yesterday I peed on myself.

Literally. Ok, well, maybe not literally, but not all of it made it in the toilet, that's for sure.

So, I was picking the kiddo up from the grandparents (hers), and I decided to stop by the grandparents (mine). I left the little bucket of slobber outside in the beautiful weather, while I ventured my way to the bathroom.

Now, you have to realize, my grandparents are in their mid-80s. And I love them. To death. But, you know how when you're a kid and everything at grandma's house is covered in plastic and smells funny, and you find things in the bathroom that you're pretty sure belong in a museum (or, at least the trash)? I can remember the time I realized the horror that is dentures. My grandmother hadn't put them in their clever little case, and I walked in and their were teeth on the counter. Yeah, it was pretty freaky.

Actually, I'm always reminded of the movie "Dennis the Menance" when I think about my grandparent's bathroom. If you haven't seen it, check it out. There is a super funny scene which involves mouth wash for nose spray and cleaner for mouth wash. Hysterical.

Anyways, back to the peeing on myself. So, since spring has sprung, I opted for a skirt that morning. And, in the rush to get the business taken care of and out of the museum of things found in the bathroom's of senior citizens, I just pulled the skirt up rather than down. Or, so I thought.

Luckily, I noticed what was happening before anything too awful happened, and what did happen only happened to the hem of my skirt. So, I dried it off, and coyly found my way past the plastic covered sofa and china cabitnet full of every tiny beeny baby McDonald's has ever released, back outside.

And I left my little secret to myself. And maybe those people that kept looking at me funny in Walmart.


  1. Now, the sofa thing isn't true and either is the stuffed toys!

  2. Excuse me. Not literally covered in plastic, but might as well be, and I am pretty sure she does have every teeny beany baby from mcdonald's. Maybe not all in that cabinet, but I've seen them, they're there.